Who Is Going To Apologize To Tiger?

It amazes me the way the media and adoring public like to elevate people like Tiger Woods to God-like status and then take great pleasure in being the same ones to knock him off the pedestal. Before going further, let it be said that the people hurt the most in this are Elin Woods, their children, and guess who.... Tiger Woods. What a bunch of holier than though SOBs there are in the world that can be so judgmental. Why don't we take a look at this from the other end of the telescope for a minute? Here goes:


Tiger Woods from childhood on had more determination and self discipline than anyone I know. Strong parenting and a determination to succeed made him an icon at a very young age. Once he completed Stamford University he could forget any semblance of living a normal life. For a moment, let's compare that to the average 21 year old.

At 21 Tiger was already famous. He no longer had the luxury of taking a walk down a public street; go shopping at a mall; or have a quiet reflective moment over a cup of coffee somewhere. The naive look at that as something special, to be adorned, to always be wanted in presence - but think about it - would you like to be at everyone's beckon call 24/7? Not me. Heck, I have trouble staying calm when just a few of life's demands exceed my ability to manage them.

And what about the Woods children? Wouldn't it have been nice if Elin and Tiger had the anonymity to take their children to the zoo so they can watch the kids wide eyed, marveling at these magnificent creatures, while the questions grew in their minds? Those poor kids need a chance to assimilate with the rest of the world or forsake general social skills that come with being just another unrecognizable name among the millions. The Woods children don't and will never have that luxury. But... back to Tiger himself for a minute.

Tiger Woods did more to popularize the game of golf than anyone in the history of the game - including my idol, Arnold Palmer. The salaries/purses that these players see now-a-days is largely attributable to Tiger Woods. Advertisers and sponsors want a piece of the action because they know that people, even non golfers, can appreciate the unthinkable ability of Tiger Woods in the game of golf. Other PGA players, fans, and the casual golfer all benefitted from Tiger Woods contribution to golf. And what does he get? Some idiot like Johnny Miller saying "Tiger hurt golf." Tiger brought more to this game than he'll ever take away.

But, that just wasn't enough for the greedy sponsors and judgmental fan base that finally found a way to level the playing field so to speak. They wanted MORE!  Few, if any of us will ever rise to the character level of Tiger Woods, so the best way to get his company is to drag him down to a level where we can feel better about ourselves. Tiger made his mistakes, no doubt about it. And it is his to come to terms with. For Johnny Miller, the PGA, or anyone other than the Woods family to claim victimization on the issue is beyond the pale.

Now, let's put the shoe on the other foot. You are a world class athlete. You are approaching Billionaire status. The world thinks your the greatest thing since sliced bread. You have a lovely wife at home, in a mansion that your talents paid for, and she has bore you two healthy children. But real is real - any mother and father of two children that age knows that there is little time for each other while they meet the demands of the children. Yes, a nanny is an option, but Tiger Woods came from a background that said child rearing is the parent's responsibility.

So, there you are. Traveling 10 months out of the year, in many cases, with your spouse and children at home so they can at least get some semblance of a normal life. You are visiting other countries and your sponsors are ringing your phone off the hook because they demand a bigger piece of your time than is humanly possible. When you go to social events or even a night spot, the gold diggers are throwing their panties (or in the inverse, boxer shorts & briefs) at you. You're tired, you're lonely, you miss home, you miss the normalcy of being able to appear anywhere in public because your picture will be pasted all over every tabloid, newspaper, and magazine in the world. So, in a weak moment, you reach out for some companionship, comfort, and the arms of someone who will not question you for a life long commitment. In a nutshell, you'd just like a little bit of privacy and normalcy in your life, but the road you chose had a price - and that was it.

But the important part of this equation is the addiction end of things, if in fact, it is a legitimate sex addiction. One day you may want to talk with a police officer, EMT, Firefighter, or an extremely successful business person. Saving lives or providing something substantial for the community fills a person with adrenaline and a sense of power. By my personal experience, I happen to know that that energy needs to go "somewhere." Any healthy young man in his thirties who has experienced major successes or life saving experiences understands the sense of power it makes you feel.

When you add all the successes of Tiger Woods one upon another and we treat him as something of superhuman value, such delusions of omnipotence only drive the normal sexual urges even higher. I suspect that Tiger's fame in a sense had forced him into isolation and believe it or not, loneliness. Ironic isn't it? When the man stepped into public he was surrounded by people ten deep wanting his autograph, while at the same time was and is probably one of the loneliest people on earth. And there is no putting the toothpaste back in the tube once such a level of fame has been realized. For whatever reason, the general public and media believe that your most private and cherished personal moments are for public consumption. I for one could not live like that.

Tiger Woods never failed at anything he set his mind upon - so there is no way he could see the liability (in an addiction sense) of him trying to find some comfort outside his home. He knew and knows on the face of it that it is/was wrong - but he never failed at anything of magnitude so why should he believe that some dalliances would be his undoing. He bought into a the illusion we all helped him create. One that said he was above it all or in his words 'acted as if a different set of rules" applied to him.

For his detractors, perhaps it gives some form of satisfaction if you believed as I do, that regardless of how many intimates involved, he never found what he was really seeking and that was to fill a void in his life that has been created largely by his success and an culture so desperate for iconic heroes. My heroes wear camouflage, khaki, denim and/or dress blues and are kicking doors half way around the world to give us this right to opine. We are the ones who elevate these successful athletes to hero status and then kick them when they show they are human.

While Tiger Woods was cheating on his wife - so goes it for thousand or tens of thousands spouses out there in the world. But, Tiger gets held (and has been holding himself to a different standard). If you listen to the world ... he owes everyone an apology. Frankly, so long as he makes his amends with his wife and children, from that point on I don't think he owes the world a damn thing. We are the ones that made him the role model. WE are the ones who told our children that "this is what hard work and success will do... it will make you the champ.." and then when Tiger didn't live up to the promises WE made our children, then we hold him responsible? What a crock

What I see and what I have seen for a long time in Tiger Woods is a man of incredible talent who never got to enjoy a normal young adult life before being cast into the shining spotlight. It was only a matter of time before a crack in the veneer appeared. Believe it or not - the man is only human. He wanted what we all want. A friend or lover who wants us for who we are not what we are. Tiger, like others of his fame level will never again be able to look another human being in the eye without wondering if at least in some way, it was his fame that attracted the person of the moment, rather than just a genuine interest to share some time with a kind person, with a generous heart, and likeable personality.

Tiger and the likes will never, ever again be able to initially accept a person on face value and thus, be left wondering if there are not financial, materialistic, or fame motives attached to their offer of friendship or romance. So, when I think about walking the mile in Tiger's shoes, I see a life of seclusion, loneliness, feelings of unbridled power, normal desires for physical and emotional acceptance all playing off one another. And there he sits, rich beyond most people's dreams, successful to a level that few people in life will ever reach, but so completely alone that he can only hear the echo of his own thoughts.

From what I can see, Tiger is taking a sincere and honest look inside himself. And I applaud him for that and I thank him for all he has given me in the ways of enjoyment. As for his personal problems, they should remain just that. Personal! The only atonement Tiger owes is to his wife and family. Everyone else got more from Tiger Woods and his successes than was ever taken away from them. Yet, these gutless sponsors and fair weather fans are demanding something they don't deserve. If anything, we owe Tiger, Elin, and their children an apology for demanding they let us into their every personal moment.

I think it should start with the sponsors who bailed out on Tiger after reaping billions in profits, thanks in part, to his endorsements. But, the minute things got a little tough, they turned and ran rather than support the man and his family on an emotional level, perhaps by taking a hiatus from the business relationship rather than leaving him in the field to die. Tiger gave us all something we longed for - and when he didn't live up to our expectations, we devoured him.

Having tried to show some level of competence in the game of golf for the last 40 years, I look forward to the return of Tiger Woods to the golf course. And I don't need nor demand to know anything about his personal life to marvel at his skill and talents. Anyone who has even attempted to hit a golf ball can recognize that we are alive to witness something very special, but now the question becomes are we going to let the man live his life without casting judgment upon his every move or are we going to insist that he fulfill the need we seem to have for a God like presence in human form? He made millionaires out of people who road his coat tails all the way to the bank and when he needed us the most, where were we? We were casting the stones and Monday morning quarterbacking his every move.

From where I sit, I think that once we move on, as we should have by now on the personal side of the issue, that we will see Tiger offer us Chapter Two in mastering the game of golf through magnificence. I believe that regardless of how callously his sponsors abandoned him that it will allow him to get back to his pursuit of excellence for the joy and satisfaction of playing the game of golf rather than having to look at it as a business and a demanding one at that.

I believe that once free of all this that Tiger will take his game to even greater heights - but before we get there.... who is going to apologize to Tiger? I'll open the bidding "Tiger.. I'm sorry the world holds you to a higher standard than anyone else and by the way... thanks for the great golf. Your both an inspiration and genuinely good person.who made a human mistake. Now.. tee it up for God's sake, will you?" Oh.. and one more thing... Johnny Miller ... when you can offer golf even 10% of what Tiger has done for it, then your qualified to assess whether Tiger hurt golf or not.